Confessions
by Candyland
Summary: Gohan and Videl are finding out each others big secrets. This fic is...sort of dead.
1. Cloud Gazing and Sunsets

AN: Okay, my first stab at a G/V fic. I've always wondered if Gohan ever admitted to Videl that he was half-Saiyan, so here's my take on it. This is how it happened, I swear. Plus, I really really like G/V romance fics, so I decided to try and make it one of those too. I have no experience with romance, so please be gentle. And as usual, I do NOT own Dragonball Z, but I will. It's part of my 'Grand Master Super-de-Duper Scrumpdiddilyumptious Plan to Take Over the World' plan. Now that I've told you, I have to kill you all. After you read the story, that is.

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Confessions

The sun was sinking lower and lower in the sky in the sky, but it was still bright enough to see the variety of cloud shapes. That's what the two teenagers were looking at. Not for much longer, though. The sun would be setting shortly.

Since Master Roshi had gone to Capsule Corp for a while to get a new capsule for something from Bulma, and Turtle was off visiting some of his children, the island was deserted. Gohan and Videl had taken advantage of the fact to have a little time to themselves to just relax.

Since it was a Saturday, they didn't have school, and both were wearing something other than their school clothes. Videl was wearing denim shorts and a yellow T-shirt, while Gohan had on jeans, a white T-shirt, and a blue button-up.

They had kicked off their shoes and were sprawled out beside each other on the beach, looking up at the sky, trying to find shapes in the clouds. They'd made it into a contest to see who could find the most unusual cloud-forms. Videl was winning.

"That one there! That looks like Santa riding an alligator!" she pointed, laughing.

"You just made that up! It does not!" Gohan protested, laughing also. Then he pointed at another one. "Hey, there's Piccolo!"

Videl looked at it for a second, then nodded. "Yeah, you're right."

They lay there in silence for a moment, watching the sky change colors from blue to red and orange. For that brief minute, it felt like they were the only two people left on the planet. And for some reason, Gohan decided he liked it that way.

"Okay Gohan," Videl broke the silence as she rolled over onto her stomach to look at him. He remained on his back with his fingers interlocked and his hands under his head, and didn't say anything. "You're the Gold Fighter, Saiyaman, the kid from the Cell Games, and the one who really beat Cell. Any other secrets I should know about?

She said it teasingly, just trying to make conversation, but to her surprise, Gohan visibly siffened, and in her mind, she could actually feel his emotions. Panic…a touch of anger…and _panic._

That means yes.

She crawled over a few inches so that she was right next to him, then crossed her arms and set them on his chest. Then she rested her head on her arms so that she could look right into his face. His response was to close his eyes and keep his expression as shuttered as possible.

Now that she was certain he was hiding something else, Videl persisted. "Come on, you can tell me. Please?"

"No," he said softly, not opening his eyes. "I can't tell you."

"Why not?" she refused to give up. She get it out of him if it was the last thing she ever did. "Why can't you tell me?"

"Because," he answered flatly. But his mind said more, even though he didn't know she could hear what he was thinking.

__

Because you won't understand. Because you'll be scared. Because you'll abandon me. Because I don't want you to be afraid of me. Because I don't want you to leave me here with the emptiness. Because you'll think I'm a freak.

Videl's heart shattered within her at the bleakness of his thoughts. Without thinking she blurted out, "I don't think you're a freak, Gohan."

His eyes flew open and he stared at her as if he couldn't believe his ears.

Videl hesitated, then made her confession. "I can hear your thoughts, Gohan. Not all the time, but right now I can. And I can feel some of what you feel, your emotions. And I'm here to tell you that you aren't a freak."

"You don't know," Gohan whispered, visibly fighting with himself. "You don't know me."

"I'd like to," she said softly.

There was a long moment of silence, then Gohan sighed. "Videl, I'm only half human. My mom is a human being, my father is an alien. A Saiyan, to be exact."

Videl's eyes widened a tiny bit, but she didn't move or say anything.

"My father was sent to Earth as a baby to take over, but he ended up getting dropped on his head and getting amnesia, and becoming the guy we all knew and loved. He didn't find out that he was Saiyan until he'd grown up, gotten married, and had me. Then, when I was four years old, my father's brother, my uncle, showed up, told Dad what he was, and walked off with me. Thus ended my childhood. My father was a Saiyan. And the whole Gold Fighter thing? That's actually an advanced Saiyan form called a Super Saiyan. There's only supposed to be one every one thousand years, a full-blooded member of the Saiyan nobility. As the half-breed son of a third-class warrior who had already made the transformation, I pretty much threw all those expectations into the dust. Saiyans are ruthless killers. They were in the planet trade—they'd find a nice planet, see the sights, taste the food, and happily kill off the inhabitants so that the planet could be resold for a nice profit. If their home planet hadn't been blown up and they'd come here, they probably would've killed me on sight. They don't tolerate half-breeds. I'm trapped between two worlds—that of my father, and that of you humans. I'm not one of them, and I'm not one of you."

__

There. I said it. Now she's gonna freak out and run away.

But Videl didn't freak out, and she didn't run away. She stayed where she was for about ten seconds, just long enough for Gohan to get very nervouse, then did something surprising. She leaned down, kissed Gohan on the cheek, and stood up, walking a few feet away so that she was standing ankle-deep in the surf. In the sky overhead, the sun was sinking lower.

Gohan got to his feet and slowly moved over next to her.

"Would you say something?" he asked, feeling more and more nervous by the second. "Scream, yell, freak out, swear, I don't know, say something!"

"What do you want me to say?" she asked, not turning around. There was no harshness or fear in her voice. "Tell me, and I'll say it."

"I…don't know," Gohan suddenly felt very deflated.

"Neither do I," she turned then to face him. Her face was calm and serene. "I'm not afraid of you now, if that's what you expected. I really don't think that you're going to change as a person just because you told me that you're half alien, are you?"

"No…" he answered slowly, not sure where this was going.

"Then why should I be afraid?" she turned back to the ocean and the sunset. "You said that Saiyans are ruthless, cold-blooded killers. I have yet to see you kill anyone in cold blood, Gohan. Actually, I have yet to see you kill anyone at all."

"I have killed people, Videl," he felt compelled to be completely honest, now that his biggest secret was out in the open.

"But was it ever in cold blood? I doubt it. And you don't intend to start murdering people, I assume. So what's the problem?"

He didn't answer. His mind had wandered back…to the Cell Games…but he quickly blocked those memories, just in case she was still in tune to his thoughts.

"I completely understand why you didn't want to tell me," she continued, "and I figure you don't want anyone else to know. Don't worry about that either. I don't plan to tell anyone."

For the first time since this particular conversation had started, Gohan felt completely at ease. It was all going to be just fine. He took a few steps forward so that he right behind her.

"Um, hey Videl?" he said, feeling more then a little foolish. "Thanks."

Videl didn't answer, but instead leaned back a bit, letting her head rest against his chest. He tensed for a moment in surprise, then relaxed and put his arms around her shoulders. It was incredibly comfortable for both of them, just being able to be together and enjoy each others company without having to worry about anything else.

As if by some unspoken agreement, they both sat down in the waves and the wet sand, not caring that they were getting drenched. She still leaned against him, and he still had his arms around her. Their shadows got longer as the sun sank lower.

"Gohan?" Videl said softly, afraid that if she spoke too loudly it would destroy the mood that had enveloped this perfect moment.

"Hmm?" he answered just as softly.

"What are you thinking about right now?" she asked.

"Don't I get any secrets with you?" he retorted gently, still not breaking the mood.

"Not a chance. What are you thinking about? I can't hear your thoughts right now."

"Hmm…" he sighed happily, "I was just thinking…umm…"

"What?" she turned her head to look at him. His expression was completely unreadable.

"Well…ummm…" he still hesitated.

"Come on," she prodded, stubborness taking over.

"Just thinking about…something I'd kind of like to do right now," he said finally.

"Are you telling me the truth?"

"Yes, just not all of it."

"What do you want to do?"

"You promise you won't kill me?"

"Why would I kill you, Gohan?"

"Promise and I'll tell you."

"Okay, I promise."

Without another word, Gohan leaned down and kissed her.

Videl's eyes widened in surprise, but only for an instant. She let her eyelids fall and gave herself over the kiss and the feeling of Gohan's arms around her. It was the most unbelievable feeling she had ever experienced in her life.

When he pulled back, she felt an anguish that she'd never realized anyone could experience.

Their faces were less then an inch apart, but they both had their eyes closed as if each was afraid to look at the other.

It was Videl who moved first, leaning forward and putting her head on Gohan's shoulder, pulling him into a hug he returned wholeheartedly.

It was an embrace that had the potential to become so much more.

AN: Ta-da! My first stab at a G/V fic. I'm NOT a good judge of my own writing, so I don't know if this is good or not. Please tell me?


	2. The Truth About the Games

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AN: Let's start off with the standard "I don't own DBZ" thing and get that over with. Okey dokers, this is something else in the series that really bothered me—when the gang is flying off to meet up with Babidi and Majin Buu after the Supreme Kai shows up, Videl starts asking Gohan a bunch of questions. She asks if he's Saiyaman and the Gold Fighter, if they were the people at the Cell Games, and if he was the kid at the Games. He answers yes to all of the above. Up until this point, these were logical questions. But then she says, "And you were the one who beat Cell!" It's always bugged me that she just suddenly has this revelation—I mean, I would definitely NOT have gone from "you were the kid at the Games" to "you beat Cell". Then again, Videl's probably smarter then me…oh well, can't do anything about it. This takes place after the first chapter, so Videl does know that Gohan's an alien yadda yadda yadda. But I've kinda wondered if Gohan ever told Videl the whole story about the Games—ya know, how his father died and stuff, and how he blames himself for it. Cliché, I know, but I'm running low on inspiration lately. Wow, long AN here…huh. Well, this story is called "Confessions", so here's the next confession…

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The Truth About the Games

"Okay, where are you?" Videl growled under her breath, surveying the scenery from a bird's eye view. They'd been given the day off school because it was the eight year anniversary of the Cell Games, and there were going to be parades and all sorts of thing to celebrate the defeat of Cell.

Translation: her father was going to be hamming it up, continuing the lie. And the real hero, Son Gohan, was going to remain in obscurity, just as he had for the past eight years.

She'd gone over to his house to see him, but he was acting…well, strange was the kindest word she could put to it. Namely, she'd knocked on the door, and he'd opened it…and then brushed past her, calling over his shoulder that he was going to see Piccolo. He had to have known she was there—he ran right into her, for the love of Kami! But for all that he reacted she might as well have been invisible.

Needless to say, she was a little bit ticked off about that. Okay, she was furious. How dare he!

They'd been working on strengthening the strange mind-to-mind bond they shared, though she still didn't know exactly what it was, though she suspected that Gohan did. Now that she was trying to track him down, she decided it was a good thing they'd been practicing with that thing.

"I've got you now," she chuckled, swooping down into the trees. Flipping over, she landed gracefully on her feet and took a look around. He had to be nearby…but she couldn't pick up any thoughts or emotions from him. That was another thing they'd quickly mastered—how to close the door on the bond, figuratively speaking. It was useful for the sake of privacy, but right now, it was frustrating beyond belief.

Videl wandered through the foliage, following what she could get from the bond. He was moving…out of the forest…

Finally, she found him. He was sitting on top of a high hill not far outside the forest. His back was to her; he didn't react when she approached.

"Gohan?" she called tentatively. He didn't answer. She tried again, more forcefully. "Gohan!"

This time she got an answer. "You really shouldn't be here."

"I can do whatever I want, thank you very much," she answered angrily. "What's the big idea, acting like I don't exist?"

"It's not a good day for me, okay?" he said softly, hoping desperately that she would just go away and leave him to the rampaging storm of emotions that always tore through him on this particular day.

He should have known better. Videl was far too stubborn to just let him off the hook. "Oh, that's your excuse? It's a bad day? How do you think I feel about today? It's been eight years to the day since Cell died, and my father's out there, making an idiot of himself over something that never really happened! And I have to put up with it. How about that, Gohan? How's that for a bad day? You have nothing to complain about, Gohan!"

"Wanna bet?" he climbed to his feet unexpectedly. "You have no idea."

"You defeated Cell, Gohan!" Videl stamped her foot impatiently, feeling more like a little girl throwing a temper tantrum then an eighteen-year-old woman dealing with a difficult friend. "What could possibly be bothering you about today?"

"Don't," he turned and looked at her, his face void of emotion. "Just don't."

"Don't what?" she knew she was being unreasonable, but when her curiosity was aroused, there was only one way to settle it down again.

"I don't want to talk about it," he snarled, then started walking away, down the hill.

"Oh no you don't!" she jumped in front of him. That was the thing that was making her so angry—the fact that he wouldn't even offer her a semblance of an explanation. That, and the fact that he'd nearly trampled her on his way out the door.

"Videl, please!" he said pleadingly, moving to one side to try and step around her. She moved to block him. He tried the other side; she moved again. "Videl, I really don't want to talk about it."

"Why not?" she demanded.

Gohan simply stared at her for a second, then actually picked her up, spun around, and set her down before turning and continuing down the hill, all without answering.

"God, you're acting like you just lost your best friend in the world!" she yelled at him.

Surprisingly, he stopped dead in his tracks and whirled around to face her, anger plastered across his handsome features. "What did you say?"

Taken aback by his reaction, it took Videl a second to reply. "I said you're acting like your best friend just died or something."

Before she could even blink, he was less than a foot away from her. "You really don't get it, do you? You wanna know what my problem is? It's the day. Tell me again what day it is?"

Videl unconsciously took a step back to try and put some distance between herself and Gohan's all-too-visible anger. "The—the anniversary of the Cell Games. Eight years since you beat Cell."

"Exactly," he snarled, then stepped back, turning away from her again. "Would you like to know what happened at the Cell Games, Videl? The real story, I mean."

"Tell me," she answered flatly, not understanding what could have possibly happened at the Games that would make him behave like this.

"The real fun began when I watched Cell kill Number 16," he began in a voice laden with anger. "If 16 hadn't been programmed to kill my father, he never would've hurt any living thing. Well, Cell ripped him to pieces, and then stepped on his head. This, on top of the fact that I was watching everyone that was important to me get their butts kicked by the Cell Juniors. I lost it. I lost my temper. And I went to an entirely new level of Super Saiyan. I explained to you what that whole thing was about."

He paused then, and Videl prodded him. "Keep going."

"First I took care of the Cell Juniors. Then I went hand-to-hand against Cell himself, and I was winning," Gohan continued, his tone making it quite obvious that he would have rather been having his arms and legs sawed off at that point than discuss what they were talking about. "I had him against the ropes. It was the most incredible rush. I was invincible! I actually managed to blast his arms and legs off."

"That's good, right?" Videl asked.

"Yes, that was good. It's what happened next. My father told me to finish Cell off, to get rid of him. And I said no. I wanted Cell to suffer. I wanted him to be in pain. Cell took advantage of that to regenerate. He knew he couldn't beat me. So he started to self-destruct. If we hit him, he'd explode, a blast big enough to destroy the entire planet. And if we waited, the same thing would happen. And this was because of me. Oh, just wait, it gets better."

He turned his head slightly to look at her out of the corner of his eye.

"What could we do? Well, my father had an answer. See, Dad knew this trick called an Instant Transmission. What that meant was that if he could sense someone, he could teleport to their location. If someone else is touching him when he does this, they'll be teleported with him. Well, guess what he did. He teleported Cell off of our planet before he could finish self-destructing. Thus died Son Goku, my father."

Videl's jaw dropped. "But…I thought—"

"Cell came back," Gohan snapped bitterly. "My father's sacrifice was in vain. That's when I took Cell down. And I didn't give him a chance to regrow anything the second time around. But before he died, he managed to take out another one of my friends. Then he tried to go after Vegeta, and I took the blast, losing the use of my left arm in the process. I beat him one-handed."

Gohan turned around then. She'd never seen such sad eyes.

"So you see, Videl, my father was killed by Cell. And it was my fault. I'm the reason my little brother doesn't have a father. Dad had to clean up after my mistake. He died because of _my_ pride, _my_ arrogance…and _my_ stupidity." His last three words were the barest hint of a whisper. "That's my really big secret, Videl. And that's why today is not a good day for me. Okay?"

Without waiting for a response, he pivoted and continued on his way, leaving a stunned Videl standing alone on the hill.

"Just leave him alone," a soft voice said from behind her.

She spun around. "Krillen!"

"It's not an easy day for any of us, Videl," Krillen sighed, walking closer to her. "Gohan especially. It wasn't his fault, but of course he doesn't believe us when we tell him that. All of us lost something when Goku left. Everyone lost a friend—for me, it was my best friend. ChiChi lost her husband. But Gohan lost his father, and nothing can make up for that kind of loss. Usually we just leave him alone, and he beats himself up over it. We just send someone out to check on him every once in a while, make sure he doesn't really lose it. That's why I'm here. The whole thing makes poor Goten pretty miserable, though."

It was then that she saw that he had tears in his eyes. "I didn't…I mean…I didn't know…"

He silenced her with a wave of his hand. "Give him a little time. Right now he's not even a person, he's just a bundle of raw emotions. I'd be willing to bet that now he's off somewhere, brooding, and not only beating himself up over what happened at the Games, but over the fact that he took it out on you."

"Should I apologize?" Videl was really agonizing.

Krillen shook his head. "He wouldn't want to hear it right now. Give him a little time, and chances are that he'll apologize to you."

"Okay…" Videl answered doubtfully.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Videl was propped up in bed reading late that evening. Outside her window, she could hear the party still going on. In her father's honor, of course.

Her conscience was really giving her a hard time about the situation with Gohan. Why was she so damned stubborn? Now he was mad at her because thanks to her he'd had to relive that awful day. And he'd been what, ten or eleven at the time? Too young to lose a parent in any manner, especially like that.

Sighing, she gave up on the book. It was just a feeble attempt to distract herself from the problem. Tossing the reading material onto the comforter beside her, she leaned over to pick up the phone.

__

I'll call him, she thought._ I'll call him and apologize. Then it's off my conscience._

But she froze with her hand on the receiver. What if he wouldn't talk to her? What if he got angry again? She knew she was being silly, but when you're uncertain about something, your mind can cook up the most outrageous possible outcomes, and become convinced that they're possible.

She vacillated for a good sixty seconds with her hand still on the receiver when the phone rang. Videl actually jumped back, and for a moment just stared at the phone.

__

Get a grip! she mentally chastised herself as she reached over again and picked up the phone. She hesistated for just a moment before speaking. "Hello?"

A second of silence. Then a timid voice asked, "Videl?"

She smiled at the sound of the voice, but kept her tone level. "Hi, Gohan." She could almost hear him sweating on the other end of the line.

"Umm…Videl, I…umm…" he stammered while she waited. Finally, "…I…I wanted to apologize for what I said earlier. I shouldn't have gotten so angry. You didn't know. I'm sorry."

"I should apologize too," she could have sighed with relief. "I need to stop being so stubborn. You have a right to keep a few secrets," she paused, then added, "I guess."

Momentary silence, then a dry chuckle. "Since when do I get secrets with you?"

"Never," she admitted. "But if I start doing something like that again, just do us both a favor and smack me upside the head."

"Gotcha," he answered. His tone was lighter, but she could still pick out something else in his voice, and it worried her.

"Gohan, are you okay?"

That silence again. "Not really. But I will be. Don't worry."

"Sure?"

"Positive."

"Well…okay, if you say so," Videl said dubiously. "But you sound exhausted. Go to bed and get some rest. Right now."

That elicited another wry laugh. "Yes, Mother. Good night, Videl."

"Sweet dreams."

She hung up the phone feeling strangely vindicated. There was something telling her that she hadn't even gotten the full story, but she decided to disregard that particularly poisonous little thought. He didn't deserve to have her breathing down his neck right now.

Videl clicked off the light and pulled the comforter up to her chin. At least they were on good terms again. And at that moment, that was all that mattered.

AN: YAY! I finally got this thing done! A nice long chapter for everyone who was so patient as to wait for this. It doesn't feel like it's as good as the original, but then again, sequels rarely are, I guess…oh well. Sorry it took forever to get this thing out, but I had a little trouble getting started. Like, oh say, five tries? Well, at least it's done. I have an idea for a couple more little confessions, do you guys want me to write more, because I can. I'll try to get it done faster this time, I promise. I'm still having trouble with the fight scene for "Faith". It's too short. Or is that a bad thing? I dunno. Oh well, just DON'T KILL THE AUTHOR!!!! Thanks a bunch, buh-bye!


	3. That's What Friends Are For

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AN: Woo-hoo! I actually got another one done! Man! Sorry this took forever, but I actually decided that instead of writing up an entirely new story as a follow-up for "A Price Paid in Blood," I would just scribble out a one-shot response to the story and make it a part of "Confessions." Not a bad plan. If you haven't read PPIB, this may or may not make sense. I tried to write it so that it would. This story follows the alternate ending, just so you know. I don't own DBZ. Now onto the story!

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That's What Friends Are For

"Oh! I get it!" Videl said happily. Gohan grinned back and they moved onto the next section.

She and Gohan were studying for the upcoming trigonometry test. Probably Videl's worst subject, it was something that Gohan had been doing since he was about eight. And of course, when she'd asked him to help her, he'd readily agreed. And it was finally making sense to her.

Well, some of it was, anyway. Half of it was still soaring twelve feet over her head.

But what they moved onto wasn't twelve feet over her head. More like _fifty_ feet. Oh, it was so confusing! And Videl didn't like not understanding things.

Finally, she threw her pencil down in disgust and put her elbows on the table, resting her chin in her hands, trying to look pitiful. "This really sucks."

Gohan smiled, somewhat amused at her frustration. "It's not that difficult. Really, it's not. You'll get it eventually. Let's try another approach..." They'd been at it for a while, and due to the heat of the day, Gohan had rolled his sleeves up to his elbows.

Three 'different approaches' later, Videl once again chucked her pencil against the table and threw her arms up into the air. "I give up! This is impossible!"

He set his pencil down a little more carefully then she did and held out his hands, palms up, in a gesture of helplessness. "Videl, I'm doing the best I can! There are only so many ways to do math problems, and one of them has to work for you!"

Videl looked down at the table, still feeling quite frustrated. If she hadn't, she wouldn't have noticed something strange on Gohan's hand.

Or rather, his left wrist.

A thin white line stretched from his palm halfway to his elbow. If she didn't know better, she would have said that it looked like a scar or something...but why would Gohan have a scar like that on his wrist? Unless...unless...

__

No way, she told herself firmly. _I'll ask, and he'll tell me it's a birthmark or something weird like that. That's all. It's nothing._

Videl reached out and grabbed his hand so that he couldn't pull it back. Gingerly, she traced the line with her thumb before looking up at him. "Gohan, what's this?"

The smile disappeared. All the color drained from Gohan's face, and he immediately shuttered his expression. "Nothing," he said softly, yanking his arm back so suddenly that she didn't have time to brace for it and as a result lost her grip on his hand. He immediately put both hands under the table, out of sight, and looked at her pointedly. "Let's get back to trig, shall we?"

"Gohan, what is that?" she asked again, knowing full well that she shouldn't be prying, but unable to help herself. _This guy has way too many secrets!_ "Tell me!"

"No. Just forget it," he replied evenly, keeping his eyes on the textbook in front of him and his hands safely hidden under the table, out of sight. "Let's try the trig again."

With much force, she managed to wrestle a good chunk of her attention back to the task at hand, but she was distracted. Why would Gohan have a scar like that?

As they settled back into their work, Gohan seemed to relax quite a bit. He actually pulled his hands back into view and rested them on the table, though he seemed to be unconsciously rubbing his wrist. But he seemed to be completely comfortable again, right back to normal. Videl tried her best to bite back her curiousity, but her eyes kept straying to his left wrist.

When he leaned across the table and reached out to point to something on her paper, she couldn't control herself. She took his hand in both of hers and slowly rotated his arm, allowing her to get another, far better look at that scar.

She could feel the muscles in Gohan's arm beneath her touch, especially as she traced the path of the thin white line halfway up his arm. When she looked up, she was quite startled to find herself looking straight into his dark eyes.

In her eyes, Gohan saw the question; in his eyes, Videl saw the answer.

"I did that when I was fourteen," he said unhappily. Videl recognized the tone. That voice meant that he would have rather swallowed live sea urchins than tell her, but he already understood that she wouldn't get off his back until he gave her a straight and honest answer.

"You did what?!?" Even though she knew what a scar like that meant, Videl was still shocked.

"I tried to kill myself when I was fourteen years old," he replied.

"But why?" Videl asked incredulously. Gohan—shy, sweet, intelligent Gohan—he just didn't seem like the suicidal type!

"Because I wanted to die," he said softly. "My life was crap. I lost control of the lie, and everything went straight to hell from there."

Videl looked suspicious. "The lie?"

"The lie that I was over my father's death. The lie that everything was all right. I told a whole bunch of lies from when I was eleven to when I was fourteen, and they caught up with me. When everyone found out what I was doing, suicide was the only way I could think of to get away." Gohan's eyes dropped to the tabletop as he realized that he'd just given her a nice wide opening to pry into a time he didn't want to talk about. Now or ever.

She saw the opening, and pounced. "What were you doing?" Thoughts of drugs, sex, and violence towards others chased each other through her mind. But it wasn't any of those.

Gohan sighed and decided to just get it over with. Chances were that she'd find out eventually anyway. Or at least, he figured that she would. "I cut myself, Videl. Daily for three years. That's how long it took for me to slip up enough so that my mother found out about it, and she recruited Vegeta and Piccolo to find me. They had to hunt me down because once I realized that my mother knew, I ran away. Well, to make a long story very short, they caught up to me. But I couldn't go back. So I used one of my trusty razor blades and cut my wrist open."

Videl was staring at him open-mouthed. Whatever she had been expecting, it certainly wasn't _that._ "So what happened?"

"Dende healed me, and they took me home," he answered shortly.

"Is that all?" she asked.

"No," he replied, knowing full well that she'd know if he lied. "A bunch of other stuff happened that I'd rather not go into right now, all right?"

For the first time in all the time Gohan had known her, Videl nodded and backed down. But she did ask another question. "Will you ever tell me?"

He shrugged noncommittaly. "Maybe."

"Are you okay now?"

"Yeah," he lifted his eyes again to meet her gaze so that she would know he was telling the truth. "It took a lot of time, a lot of help, and a lot of love, but I got over it. And I learned my lesson. I haven't done that since." He paused and chuckled. "Actually, I pretty much owe my life to Goten. I doubt he remembers it, since he was only two years old at the time, but his love pulled me back. He saved me."

"Will you ever tell him?" Videl's heart was cracking in two. How could anyone possibly know that kind of despair? She had never expected this out of Gohan.

"I don't know," he said honestly. "Maybe. When he's older. Right now, I don't think he'd understand, and he'd probably get scared if I told him now. He's too young still."

"Well, I'm glad you told me," she said truthfully. "I'm glad you know you can trust me with all these secrets you seem to be keeping."

"Actually, you'd be amazed at how nice it is to actually have someone I can talk to. I mean, outside of the gang," he rubbed the back of his neck. "They already know all the details. And I owe them a lot too. Goten may have pulled me back, but a two-year-old sure as hell can't beat any sense into a person's head. That honor fell mostly to Piccolo, Vegeta, and my father." He paused. "It was kind of weird, but when I was...dying...I saw something strange. You know how everyone says your life is supposed to flash before your eyes? Well, mine did. But I remember very clearly that the last thing I saw was a young man talking to someone, a teenage girl. I didn't have clue what it meant until one day, I woke up and looked in the mirror, and realized...the guy was me. Not long after that, I found out who the girl was. You. I don't know what it means, and I guess it really doesn't matter. I never told anyone about that, though. None of my friends know. I just told them that my life really did flash before my eyes." He stopped again, and got a strange look in his eyes. "I owe everyone so much...and I doubt I'll ever be able to repay it."

"First of all, that's what friends are for," she leaned back. "They keep each other sane. For example, I don't know how I survived all that time without my trusty sidekick Saiyaman around to block all the bullets and stop missiles in midair." He feigned a pout at the part about him being a 'sidekick', and she smiled at him. "And secondly, I'd be willing to bet that you keeping a solid head on those shoulders and not doing anything stupid is payment enough for them."

He nodded sheepishly, then cleared his throat. "Well...now that you know almost everything about me...let's try this trig again."

AN: Ta-da! I had started another one for this installment, but I was toying with the idea of a sequel to "A Price Paid in Blood" where Videl finds out. So instead of writing an entirely new story, I just made it into another Gohan confession. See? I put two and two together and got...iguana? Wait...hmmm...oh well. I'm not sure if I'll be putting another chappie up for this story or not. I've got one more idea, and I may or may not write it. We'll see, no promises.


	4. A Family Portrait

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AN: By request, I finally got up another chapter for this, and guess what—it's Videl's turn! Due to a serious lack of creativity, I'm pulling out a classic fanfiction cliche and writing my version of it. You'll see what I mean when you read it. Bon appetite! For a disclaimer, see every single one of my other fanfics.

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A Family Portrait

The ceiling was quite a bit less than interesting, but for the moment, it was the only thing Videl really cared to look at. There was nothing special about it, just plain, white...whatever they call the stuff that ceilings are made out of.

Sprawled on her back on her unmade bed, Videl was quite content to stay right where she was. The prospect of not moving all day was becoming more and more appealing with each minute she lay there. Unfortunately, there were a couple of things standing in her way concerning that.

First of all, her father probably wouldn't let her. There was undoubtedly something going on in his honor that she just _had_ to attend. Even though it was the worst possible day to have any kind of festivity.

Secondly, if she had to stare at that Kami-awful ceiling much longer, chances were that she would go insane and kill something, and she had a feeling that it wouldn't go over well if the daughter of the Hero of the World were to jump out the window and senselessly kill some poor random guy on the street. No, that wouldn't go over well at all.

Sighing, she closed her eyes. Nope, it wasn't any better. Besides, sitting here alone with her memories probably wasn't the best thing in the world. Especially on _this_ particular day.

Videl groaned and forcibly dragged herself off the bed and to her feet. She stood in the middle of her bedroom and looked around forlornly. The room was decorated almost entirely in white, with odd touches of color here and there—a burgundy rug here, a forest green throw pillow there, a navy blue chair by the desk.

With the mood she was in, the white was almost blinding. Shaking her head sadly, she crossed the room and picked up a framed picture that was sitting on the dresser and looked at the photo encased in the frame. Tears welled in her eyes.

__

Damn it, why do I do this to myself? she thought bitterly, gently running her fingers over the glass. It wasn't fair, it just wasn't fair...

It was too much. She had to go somewhere or else she was going to go quite mad. And she needed to talk to someone. She really didn't care who, just as long as they were alive and could hear. But she did have someone in mind...

Still carrying the picture with her, Videl ran through the open door onto her balcony and leapt into the air. Taking flight was second nature to her now, and she could attain high speeds. That's just what she did, heading off towards the mountains that lay well beyond the city limits.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Gohan looked up towards the sky. "Huh?"

Nearby, a confused expression crossed Goten's face. "What's up, Gohan?"

"Videl's heading this way," the teenager replied. "And from the feel of it, she's in a hurry. I wonder what's up." Though he didn't say it, Gohan was picking up something else from Videl through their mind-to-mind link. She was deeply upset about something. And Gohan was extremely curious as to what could possibly have her so worked up. Whatever it was, he seriously doubted that it would be good. "Hey, squirt, I'm gonna go meet her halfway and see what's up. Why don't you head inside, okay?"

"Okay!" Goten chirped. The chibi darted inside the house, and Gohan took to the air.

It didn't take him long at all to find her. In fact, she very nearly ran into him in midair. It was only by a quick move on Gohan's part that a head-on collision was avoided.

Videl screeched to a halt. "Oh, Kami! I'm sorry!"

"It's okay," Gohan checked himself to make sure he was all right. "No harm done."

"Oh, dammit! Today sucks!" Videl yelled before she burst into tears.

"Uh...Videl, it's okay," Gohan looked startled. Why on Earth would Videl be crying over something as silly as that? No, there was something seriously wrong with this picture. "Videl?" She wasn't calming down at all, so he put his hands on his shoulders and pushed her down towards the ground. They landed together in a wide field of tall sweet-grass, and the second her feet touched the ground, Videl sat down and cried into one hand; her other hand was clutching a picture frame.

"Hey," Gohan sat down next to her and let one arm slide around her shoulders. "What's wrong?"

"I'm...I'm sorry..." she choked between sobs. "I...it's the day..."

"What's wrong with the day?" he asked.

"It's...here..." she thrust the picture into his hand before turning away slightly; she pulled her knees up to her chest, rested her arms on her knees, and cried into her arms.

At a loss for what to do, Gohan looked at the picture in his hands. There were three people posing in the photo. Hercule Satan was in the back, looking every inch his usual obnoxious self, except that instead of his usual outlandish grin, he was wearing a genuine smile. In front of him was a little girl on a woman's lap. Gohan didn't have too much trouble figuring out who they were. Two identical pairs of blue eyes looked at him from the picture—eyes he saw nearly every day.

"This is your family," he said softly. Videl made a small noise of assent. "And this is your mother, isn't it?" Another sound of agreement. "You look like her." It was true—Videl's mother had the same dark hair and the same slender face as her daughter.

"Yeah, I know," Videl replied with a sniffle. Apparently, she'd gotten herself back under full control, and the only sign that she'd been crying was the fact that her eyes were red and puffy. "That was the last picture we had taken as a family. Then..."

"...then what?" Gohan prodded gently. Some small part of him was reprimanding him for even daring to pry into Videl's life. The rest of him was thinking that it was fair game, considering all the times that she had done the very same thing to him.

"...then Mom...got sick..." Videl's voice broke, signaling that she was perilously close to breaking down into tears again.

Gohan started. This was entirely new to him. He'd known that Videl's mother was gone, but he had never asked where she was. It just wasn't something that they talked about. "What happened?"

"Cancer," Videl whispered. "I was four when she was diagnosed, and six when she died. That picture was taken just after my fourth birthday. Before all hell broke loose."

"Oh...oh god...Videl..." Gohan was completely at a loss for words.

"I don't remember her very well," Videl continued in a strained voice; she spoke as if Gohan wasn't really there. Perhaps that was all she'd needed was a convenient pair of ears, and that's why she'd come looking for him. "Most of what I do remember is the treatments and the doctors and the hospitals and stuff. And when you're six years old, a hospital is a pretty scary place. It's been twelve years to the day since she died."

Gohan nodded slowly. He'd been in the hospital a couple times by the time he was six.

"Dad never talks about her much. When she died, he didn't really even talk to me for a long time. I don't know exactly how he felt about her really, but it's been so long, it's like he forgot about her, and...now he just runs around all the time with those silly women. I hate them all. They're not my mother."

"No...no one can ever replace a mother," Gohan said softly. "Or a father."

"I lost them both," Videl spat, suddenly angry. "I lost Mom to cancer, and I lost Dad to fame and glory. And I shouldn't have had to lose either." Tears sprang into her eyes again, and her anger receded. "That's the last picture I have of her. I remember getting that picture taken. I remember that time, very faintly...I remember that we were happy..."

That seemed to be the breaking point, and whatever Videl might have said next was lost in a fresh flood of tears. She cried as if she'd lost her entire world.

Very slowly, Gohan slid his arms around her shoulders and pulled her in to let her cry on his shoulder. He knew how it felt to lose someone close. He'd experienced it more times than any single person should have had to in his life.

"You know I feel," Videl said suddenly in an echo of his thoughts. "You lost your father."

"Yeah, I did," Gohan replied.

"I've never talked about this with anyone," Videl continued. "After she died, I just wouldn't cry and I wouldn't let myself talk about it. I just toughened up."

Gohan was stunned. "You've been just bottling this up for twelve years?!?"

A small nod was his answer.

"Good Kami, Videl!" he nearly yelled in surprise. "No wonder you're losing it so bad now!"

"What about you?" she asked, looking up at him. "When your Dad died, did you lock it up?"

"No. My friends wouldn't let me," Gohan smiled gently at the memory. "Well...they tried their very best to get me to talk about it, and I did. Kind of. I just didn't tell them everything. You know what happened after that. And that happened because I didn't let everything out when I should have, and I really paid for it later."

Videl nodded. She had seen the scar on Gohan's wrist, the result of a suicide attempt that had followed three years of cutting and lying.

"I know it was stupid," she said. "But by the time I realized that, I was just so used to locking it up that I didn't know how to stop. I don't know why I completely lost it today. I really don't."

"You went too long without venting anything," Gohan replied. "It probably just blew up."

"Yeah..." she pulled back and wiped her eyes with the back of her hands. "Well, I should probably go home. Dad doesn't know where I am." She climbed to her feet, as did Gohan.

"Here. This is yours," he handed her the framed picture. "Videl, don't do this to yourself anymore, okay? If you need to scream or rail or cry at somebody, I'm usually home. Come find me. If I have to sneak out of my room to be your sounding board or punching bag, then so be it."

He was rewarded when she allowed herself a tiny smile.

"Thanks, Gohan," Videl hugged him tightly for a minute, then looked down sadly at the picture in her hands as she turned to leave.

"Hey, Videl?" Gohan asked suddenly. "One more thing. What was your mother's name?"

She stopped and partially turned. For a minute, she was quiet. Then, very softly, she replied, "Her name was Luci." With a sad half-smile on her face, and tears still waiting in her eyes, Videl took off and started flying towards home, the last family portrait clutched in her hand and crystal tears still welled in her eyes. But now, they could fall freely.

AN: By request, a Videl confession! I know the whole 'what happened to Videl's mom' thing is seriously cliched, but that's okay. I can write cliches if I want! I hope you enjoyed it. BTW, her mom's name is Luci—as in, 'Luci-fer'. Just thought I'd point that out for anyone who didn't catch it.

On another note, I don't know if I'm going to do any more of these. I have one more idea that's been swimming around in my head for a while, and after that, I'm blank. Suggestions are welcome, by all means! Okay, I'm done. Thanks for reading!


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